i know we wont be able to be together anyway. but somehow i refusse the truth.
i bend my emotion sensor and my logical sense, trying to tell myself that we might
still have a chance being together oneday. and i wish it everyday that it might come
true. and i know how u feel hruting inside u just being strong. u miss how mush we
were in love back in the days. i know it, because i also miss the same thing.
if only i knew that i couldn't live without u earlier, i would do anthing to make
your family like me.but it was all too late for me to realize it earlier.. i'm so stupid..
i want to be like u.. being able to show that i'm also strong and i can manage even
we can't be together and in the same time trying to make you happy.. the word best friend
does hurt me a lot.. i couldn't cope yet with using the word best friend to u.. but i'll
try my best to comprehend it. we can only wish and plan like we wanted.. but we can't set
our own fate.. u wanted me to trying to find your replacement as soon as possible because
u can't stand see me hurt so much.. that shows how u love me so much.. always worried
about me and everything.. even sometime i wanted u to hate me.. hate me and throw me away..
coz i'm weighthing u down.. i don't have the strenght to let u go from the start.
i pull u don't with me.. so, if u want to be happy, just throw me away..
dont care about me.. care about yourself, your own happiness.. u deserve it..
go on with the guy u like.. i'll wish u the best wishes ever.. i wish that u would be
happier with the new guy. and someday u might forget about me.. the small mistake that
u been with long time ago.. :) i'll smile and hope that u will only shed tears of joys
and no more tears of pain from u.. and maybe one day, i will be able to live with the
truth that u are not mine anymore.. even if it still hurt some how whenever i remember
about us. if only i'm that strong.. if only.. if only everything is just a long nightmare,
and waking up seeing u sleep beside me as my wife.. if only.. if only i can wake from
this nightmare. if only i could erase our memories.. our love.. our promises.. us..
everything.. if only i could do that.. u might be able to live happy without me. my princess.

cute.

Time after time.

i have so much to tell u, so much things i want to share.. i don't even know where to start.. part that i hate and part that i love.. my new class.. my new friends.. my new roomate.. everything here is new to me.. but of all the things here, all i want is u.. i missed u so much.. for the whole month i couldn't see u.. i wanted to see u last week on my 4 days break.. that's the only time i could see u.. but u resist on meeting me.. but its okay.. i'm okay.. i've already waited u for years.. maybe i could wait for few more years.. when i'm far from u, u were busy with your friends and everything.. u couldn't give much attention to me.. nah.. but its okay.. i'm not sad.. u needed space.. that's all.. i'm alright.. sorry that i could meet u on your birthday this year.. i'm so sorry.. i was far from u and i couldn't get any holiday.. u told me how your family hates me.. but still, i love u.. we have been together for so many years.. i know when it come between me and your family, your family should come first. i know.. because if i were u, i would do that too.. so, from now onward.. u don't have to worry about my feeling anymore.. i'm a grown up now honey.. i can take care of myself.. it's just u that i'm worried.. i wish i cold look after u.. but, no matter what will happen next, i will still love u.. i don't have to say it, and u already know it right.. :) i couldn't promise that i won't do any stupid things.. but don't worry, i'll try my best to not do it.. i'll make more new friends just like u ask me too.. i'll improve my social skills just like want me too.. i'll focus on my study just like u advice me too.. maybe 1 day your mom will like me.. and when that day come.. i'll be the happiest guy on earth.. :) i love u.. forever and always.. thanks for everything sweetheart.. :)

New Chapter Begin.

“The first step towards getting somewhere is to decide that you are not going to stay where you are.”


and so the time has come.. goodbye 2010.. welcome 2011.. and its time for me to start anew.. :) its for the best.. goodbye for now. i might not be online for a while.. 

Lovely Song.

Daniel Powter - Best of me

my girl introduced to me this song and it just stick in my mind ever since. it's a lovely song. i love it. and i love her. :) so many songs to be listed if i had too, coz she already gave me lots of good songs to listen to.. as always, her sense of music are better than me.and her taste on fashion are much much better than me obviously. haha.. she's in Japan right now, it has been almost a month she's there. staying with her family. :) but less than a week, she'll be back here. and i'll definitely ask her out.. damn i missed her so much.. 

Hobbies.

i has been a while i didn't do any post. so i got some time to kill, here i am. ready to mumble about stupid things. haha.. so, todays topic i would like to pick is hobby. and i'm guessing that lot of us have our own hobby. yeah i know most of the people would deny it, but believe it or not, all of us have hobby either we realize it or not, or just trying to deny it. like we all know, most people have decent hobby like collecting stamps, read books, do sports, etc. but what i want to talk about is about the one with weird hobby. because usually theirs' are much more interesting. so, lets have a look.

first we got, cosplay lovers. ever heard of cosplay.? well, this cult started from Japan obviously, it comes from comics, manga, and anime, which they tend to wear a costume that represent their beloved character and gather around with people that tend to have the same hobby. and they got lots of fans that love doing cosplay. and as for now, people all over the world recognize cosplay as a big event and usually draw so many crowds all over the globe. so like right now, cosplay isn't just something that we can find only in Japan.

Bleach 

Naruto 

One Piece

ok.. next we got mythical being chaser. well, i shortlisted then into a few, such as ghost hunter, these people usually wanted to prove the existence of ghost and they go to various places that are famous for haunted areas and tend to stay there and try to get a footage on the site. and then Bigfoot, they even have an association that dedicate their lives on proving that Bigfoot / Sasquatch is not a myth. and then Loch Ness monster.. and last but not least, UFO / unknown flying object. all of these people that are serious about this kind of hobby tend to spend most of their money and time on proving on what they believe do exist because most of people would never believe in this kinda things and said that most of the footage about these creatures are fake. well, the world that we live in are big. and we discover lots of things everyday. the truth is out there, we might just meet something that we never believe in one day. who knows.?

Bigfoot

UFO

Loch Ness

and next we go to more extreme hobby that not many people would dare to do it. storm chaser or tornado chaser. these people that chase tornado and storm dedicate their lives on studying facts about these nature catastrophic. and these thing that they do are not child's play. so they might lose their live trying to study this thing. call them crazies.. but they love it.. haha..

The device

The cars

The tornado

so many other hobbies such as being a collector, collecting rare things, rare items and many more. doing strange sports and more. there are so many weird hobbies that we can never understand why people would do it. but that is why they call it hobby. it is usually what people will do when they are bored and got so many time to waste. :D

  

     

Its Ok.

so if all we have is that glance on the window.

if all we have is till the train stops.

if all we have is till the sun comes up,

till your lift pick you up.

and if all we have is till the day i die,

i'm ok with what we have.

(Dan Rodriguez - the circus is cheaper when its rain)