baby, i'm so sorry that i didn't reply you earlier. it has been sometime that we didn't meet each other, i mean went out dating and something like that. i miss our time together. and yeah, i still remember how we were back then on our first date. i was too nervous and i sweat a lot when we hold hands. :P sorry.. i can't control it dear. having a cute girlfriend like you is truly a dream come true you know.? hehe.. i felt like i had enough with everything and all i need is just you and you alone. :) you make me happy baby. but i was too stupid to let you go last time. i thought that you understood what i wanted to do. i wanted to be better and if its possible, to be perfect for you when i get back to you. i felt that i wasn't good enough for you. you are too good for me. so i when away thinking that my decision would be right. and when i'm back with you, i'll be a suitable boyfriend for you. a better one than what i use to be. but i didn't know what the consequence of leaving you like that without telling you the truth about what i'm going to do. i lose my grip when i knew that you were with someone else when i let you go. i fall apart. everything when upside down. i couldn't comprehend the heartbreak that i felt back than. and at that point, i know how you felt when i leave you back then. i break you heart. so i deserve to get what i did to you. the feeling was so vicious that i felt like life was not worth living anymore at that point. but thinking that one day, one day maybe we could get back together pull me back to reality. i stop being stupid and selfish. and i think at that time is that i would do anything to make sure you will be happy, even you wouldn't be with me. even i can't reach you. even i can't make you mine. i will always be your shadow. i'll be your listener if you wanted to tell me your story. i'll give you my shoulder if you wanted to cry. i'll be your best friend when you need one. :) and yes. i will be your friend forever. and i know you would do the same to me. because you do help me a lot when i was lost back then.
i do remember when we use to have our dream living together. having 4 kids and living in what kind of house and all. we were so happy to think that our dream would come true someday. but everything will stay as our dreams. :) but hey.. we can still be together right.. as friends.. :)
all in all, you don't have worry about me leaving you anymore. i will be by your side no matter what happen. unless you wanted me to go.. hehe.. i miss you. and i know i will miss you everyday. and you know it. but still. if its possible, i wanted to tell you everyday how much i miss you dear. :) go get yourself a good boyfriend next time okay! don't go searching for a guy like me. you could get a better one than me you know. :)
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